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FML
Sunday, November 8, 2009
FCK!!! why is my life so fcked up why do i get the blame for everything why is it that im always wrong, even when i think im right why is it that i always get blamed why do i have to be treated this way why can we choose our friends but not our family why cant my sis just disappear from my life; or why cant i just disappear from this world WHY DIDNT SHE JUST FCKING PUSH ME OFF THE FCKING BALCONY!! AND HARD ENOUGH TO HAVE POSSIBLY KILLED ME *RAGE!!
its not like i started fighting with her i didnt even push her it was her who started pushing me and who the fck pushes people on the balcony its not my fault that i was trying to get something off her i didnt mean to scratch her if she had given me back what was rightfully mine then all this wouldnt have happened i wouldnt be feeling this way and she was wrong for pushing me she couldve frikn killed me the balcony is the ones on the 2nd level ones so its pretty high from the ground but just i was trying to grab my things back from her mum came back home and saw but she saw her pushing me as well she nva saw me pushing her so why the fck did mum say i pushed her when i didnt why does mum always have to be on her side even though sis is a fckin idiot which is fcked up, she still should be told off but no i get told off and got fckin hit is it really wrong to restrain is it really wrong to stop being slapped is it really wrong? and then sis helps mum by trying to stop me from restraining seriously WHAT THE FCK IS WRONG WIF HER just because mum didnt tell her off she thinks shes right and all yehh, she is so right pushes me when we're on the balcony and plus i wasnt standing properly so i couldve easily lost my balance and potentially fallen so how is she right shouldnt she have been told off and slapped instead of me i already took the yelling and stuff but hell am i going to take the hitting and its not my fault for twisting my mums hand if sis didnt interfere then i wouldnt have had to change my hand position FCK!!! and now shes apparently going to ignore me lets see how this ends she'll prob give in before i do cause like she said im a person who doesnt give in and who will fight until the other person gives in
now i might not get a digital camera or a laptop fml and im gona be broke ==; cause according to her shes not gona gimme any money and fully cutting me off from any sort of available cash -.- in no bank FCK!!! but she always does that -.- after 2 wks or so she ends up giving me money and my bank account back but i have a feeling that this might go on for a bit longer =S
farout!! she frikn told me to get a job ==; seriously why does getting a job always come into arguments as if i have time she was like i have so much time on my hands and i spend so much money so i should get a job ==;
omg, seriously once i turn 16 i am so going to change my accounts cause right now my mum can practically control everything and plus i have to get a new account anyway i stuffed up my signature when i first got it ><
*sighs blogs are useful to rage on :) but still really really pissed
i really cnt study anymore finish writing maths notes and 3/5 of science notes still need to finish science and science sc is tomorrow at first i was like fck i dnt care if i fail but now after calming down i actually still care a lot about SC but i dnt think im gona study anymore not in the mood so even if i tried, it would be pointless
aiya!! this is such a depression/gloomy post all this will past after a wk or so what nice timing ==; sc tomorrow and im feeling like this
currently drowning myself in music and planning on not leaving my room until tomorrow i dnt want to eat or do anything so everyone better not come in or theyre gona get told off i dnt care if i get into more trouble i really dnt care about anything anymore i dnt care and i dnt want to care!!!
care bout sc? . . . maybe but not now ill prob care tomorrow morning though
*sighs SC tomorrow; English + Science hope i dnt fail and manage to get above band 4 hopefully band 5 for science :)
GOOD LUCK EVERYONE ^^
i take back what i said in the beginning . . . im fine . . . ? . . . not really
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